We’ve all found ourselves in situations where someone is angry with us. It could be a spouse, friend, co-worker, or even a stranger! And if you’re someone who likes everyone to be happy and nice, then these instances make you uncomfortable. You want to solve the problem and make things better. But how do you make a person who’s angry at you suddenly become nice?
4 Steps to Fix the Situation
Every situation is unique and you’ll have to determine how to best approach an angry person in the moment. However, in most cases, the following tips and techniques apply.
1. Don’t Retaliate
The number one rule is to avoid retaliation. No matter what someone does, you can’t attack back. This will only make the person angrier. A common example of this is when someone gets angry and cuts you off in traffic because you’ve been driving slower than they’d like. If you respond by cutting them off, this will infuriate them even more.
As hard as it can be, never repay an angry action with another angry action. Even though you feel disrespected, you have to put your pride aside and move on. Make sure you don’t come across as sarcastic, though, as this can infuriate an angry person even more.
2. Show Your Care
Instead of acting angry, show the person that you care about their situation. You’ll find that angry people are often that way because they feel misunderstood. Taking the time to listen may be enough to change their attitude. Depending on the situation, here are some good lines:
- Can you tell me what’s wrong? Maybe I can help.
- I’m sorry you feel that way. Is there something I can do?
- This should have never happened. How are you feeling?
Little lines like these are enough to get the angry person talking. You may eventually be able to help them see past the problem by letting them talk it out.
3. Make Yourself Human
If the angry person is directing their malice towards you, the quickest way to reduce frustration is by making yourself seem more human. Tell them how their anger makes you feel – i.e. scared, confused, or anxious – and be sure to let them know that you mean no harm in your words or actions.
4. Lighten the Mood
You have to be careful with this technique, but a mean person can often be quelled by lightening the mood. Consider telling a joke, flashing a smile, or adding perspective to something that isn’t really that big of a deal. Knowing when to do these things will get you far in life.
Don’t Let Someone Else Ruin Your Day
When it’s all said and done, it’s impossible for you to control someone else’s emotions. No matter how hard you may try, some angry people just want to remain angry. If at all possible, don’t let them ruin your day. Choose kindness and you’ll be the better person.
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