Why Even the Sweetest Couples End Up Breaking Up

Posted from http://feeds.lifehack.org/~r/LifeHack/~3/T0t3xPBRkmc/why-even-the-sweetest-couples-cant-get-through-the-honeymoon-stage

The first six months of a relationship are wonderful. There are flowers, candy and hundreds of emoji filled texts that are promptly read and responded to. You leave each other in the evening and video chat a few hours later.

You share your food, wipe each others mouths and walk down the street with your hands in each other’s back pocket.

You are happy and so in love with your companion. You can’t get enough of each other.

A year later you’ve broken up…

How You Start Never Matters

But you started off so well. The relationship was perfect. You were so sweet and in love with each other and somehow the passion still faded.

Statistics show that most relationships go from hot, heavy and passionate to “meh” in about 18 months.[1] The feelings people associate with being in love—the butterflies and the longing—dissipate during this time and the couple begins to wonder if they should carry on with the relationship.

New research shows that relationships are actually more vulnerable to demise far sooner than the dreaded seven year itch. The most common time for a couple to split is right around the two year mark.[2]

By then, you’ve most likely seen everything about your partner—their best and their worst physically and emotionally. You have started to get used to each other’s presence and the spark to stay passionate and playful has gradually faded in the relationship because you just no longer feel the same. Lots of couples end their relationship here.

What most couples who end their relationship there don’t realize is that this is just a phase. It’s a part of the process and happens to all couples.

The Five Stages Every Relationship Goes Through

The first mistake couples make is believing that when the “infatuated” feeling fades, it’s a sign that the love is fading as well. They think that when the butterflies are gone, it’s time to end the relationship.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

When it comes to relationships, experts agree there are five distinct stages.[3] Every relationship goes through these stages. The ones that last successfully make it through all five, but most relationships get stuck and fall apart during stage three.

Stage 1: Passion and Romance

This is the honeymoon or infatuation stage. It is filled with lots of kisses and touching each other for no particular reason. It is when you are completely taken by your mate and are blind to his or her flaws.

It is the easiest phase to endure and very intense.

Stage 2: Getting Serious

This is still within the infatuation or honeymoon stage. You are still blinded by love but have the clarity to see that this relationship has long-term potential. This is when the relationship becomes exclusive and you begin making long-term plans with your partner.

There is still lots of hand-holding, cuddling, and you give each other meaningful nicknames. You begin to share yourself more intimately with your mate.

Stage 3: Relationship Plateau

Stage three is when the relationship becomes real. The blinders are off and you see your partner for who they really are. Physical touch like hand-holding, kissing and other forms of physical intimacy may be starting to slow down a bit. The butterflies are gone and your partner doesn’t seem as cute as they once were.

The hardest part about stage three is that you both begin to question the relationship: where is the passion we used to have for each other? is our love fading away? is he/she the one I can be with for a longer time?

Stage 4: Moving Beyond Infatuation

Once you’ve chosen to move past stage three and to stick with the relationship, you develop a deep and intimate bond. This is the time when couples really begin to merge their lives. Serious discussions concerning marriage, kids and finances ensue and plans are made to move the couple forward as a unit.

This is when the relationship is solidified and the couple builds a life together. Many couples make it to this phase and experience a long, healthy and meaningful relationship.

But there is one more phase…

Stage 5: Becoming a Team

Stage five of the relationship is when the couple becomes a solid team. The relationship moves past “me and you” decision-making and the team becomes more important than the individuals.

This is the part of a relationship everyone longs for but few reach. It’s the true love phase.

It’s when the couple has the best chance of making it to “happily-ever-after.” That’s not to say that there will not be challenges, hardships and bumps in the road. But it does mean that both parties are committed to staying and making the relationship work no matter what.

It’s the phase of full acceptance and unconditional love.

Breaking Through the Honeymoon Stage

Most relationships that end do so somewhere within stage three. Other relationships can last for years and never make it out of stage three, but the relationship is not healthy and neither partner is fulfilled.

The first thing you must understand when you began to feel disillusioned is that feelings don’t sustain a relationship. Feelings are unreliable because they vary and are subject to moods and external factors.

Think of when a family celebrates the arrival of a newborn. At first, all of the attention is on the new addition and everything is sweet and cute. After a few months of dirty diapers, spit up and random crying, the initial excitement passes but that doesn’t mean the parents don’t love the baby anymore.

A romantic relationship works similarly. It’s the struggling process that helps both partners grow and this process also helps the relationship grow into something better, something that will last. Giving up at Stage 3 is like declaring the death of a patient with a beating heart.

The duration of each stage is different for every couple. For some couples, the honeymoon stage may last for years and for others a few months. The important thing to note is the length of the stage has no correlation to the viability of the relationship.

When you reach stage three, you have the power to determine how long it lasts. Getting out of stage three requires you to make a decision. You must decide that your relationship is worth it and you must chose to go all in.

Here are a few things you can do to help move your relationship out of stage 3:

Recognize that questioning your relationship is normal and necessary.

Allow yourself time to assess whether or not your concerns are simply connected to a loss of passion or if you have legitimate concerns about your partner and the relationship.

Talk about your concerns with the right person.

Make sure that you share your concerns with your partner. Saying something as simple as “I feel that our relationship is getting a bit boring these days, I think we should do something about it,” could be the juice the relationship needs. It will start a dialogue and assist you both in actively addressing your concerns.

Sharing your concerns and seeking advice from others during this time is normal and acceptable, just be careful who you listen to.

Make a decision and then put in the work.

Once you decide that the relationship is viable, do something about it. Don’t make your decision and then hope things will get better.

Actively work to move your relationship further. Try new things. Do things your partner likes to do. Be romantic on purpose.

Relationships take heaps of effort. It’s time to put in the work.

It’s Not How You Start, It’s How You Journey Through

All relationships take time, energy and targeted, intentional effort.

It doesn’t matter how “lovey-dovey” cute and cuddly you are in the beginning. The honeymoon will end. And when it does you must work in order to make it last. Stage three doesn’t have to be the death of your relationship. You control whether to relationship lives or dies.

Will your relationship become a stage fiver?

Featured photo credit: Jordan Bauer on Unsplash via unsplash.com

Reference

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How to Break Free From Your Own Constraints And Live the Life You Want

Posted from http://feeds.lifehack.org/~r/LifeHack/~3/DRsGf1Izlhc/how-to-hold-on-to-true-freedom-when-its-difficult-to-find-these-days

I’d like you to imagine waking up tomorrow with no limitations whatsoever.

How would you spend your day?

Who would you spend it with?

Where in the world would you be?

How would you feel?

Over the past 6 years I have asked hundreds of people this question. And guess what? 99% of them have no idea how to answer it. They have never thought about what their perfect day looks like, let alone how to describe it in vivid detail.

Somewhere along the way, people stopped chasing their dreams. They stopped imagining what their perfect day looks like and they started handing over the reigns to society who told them what to do and how to live. I found myself in this place too, where I’d given away my freedom. And I wanted it back.

What Exactly Is Freedom

According to the Oxford Dictionary, it’s the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants. But is that really what true freedom means to you?

I shared in my TEDx talk The Surprising Truth About Freedom that I believe freedom is a right not a privilege, and it’s up to YOU to create your own freedom plan.

I personally spent the last 6 years living out of a suitcase, traveling the world to 69 countries. I did this because I wanted to explore the world and experiment with living and working from anywhere and everywhere until I designed and created my perfect freedom business that supports my ideal lifestyle. Then in early 2017, I chose to flip my life 180 degrees when I bought a beautiful house and 2.5 acres of land in New Zealand with my partner, got five chickens and an adorable puppy and put down roots.

I discovered a different type of freedom that’s based around family, friends and a sense of community, as well as a profound connection to being on nature’s doorstep for my ideal lifestyle.

Why Freedom Feels So Elusive

As I’ve already stated, your version of freedom is totally unique to you, so it’s up to you to choose.

Freedom for some people it’s sailing around the world. For others it’s living in a yurt in the forest. For others it’s the right to vote. To get married, or stay single. To have a beautiful home or to have no home at all.

When I ask people if they feel free, they almost always respond with saying that the answer depends on something out of their control. For example “when I have more money and feel financially free”. Or “when I can make my own schedule and do what I want”. Or “when I’ve quit my job and can do my own thing”. Or “when I don’t have to be stuck in one place”.

THEN I’ll be/ feel free.

Here’s the thing that most people don’t realize though:

Freedom is a state of mind rather than a specific condition of existence.

True freedom starts with your thoughts, and freeing yourself from your own inner critic, or limiting beliefs that tell you what you are and aren’t capable of. We may not have been born with the same privileges, access to education, money or political rights, but we are all given the same amount of time in a day to pursue our dreams and make them a reality. And if we can’t control our external circumstances, we can definitely control our internal ones.

Freedom is the possibility to have choice and purpose helps you choose. Freedom is the space around you, where your purpose is your compass showing you where to move in that space.

Choosing Your Version of Freedom

I’m obsessed with Freedom and the definition of it. I created the Right2Freedom survey to ask people this very question. Over 500+ responses later and there is ONE universal truth emerging.

Freedom usually is split into positive and negative freedom. “Freedom from” (absence of constraints) and “freedom to” (freedom to do what we want). There is also a third level “freedom to be”, which is also a positive freedom but on a deeper emotional level; inner freedom.

It is this inner freedom that I believe is the most important, and that we intend to research further.

Your definition of freedom may be completely different to mine, but one thing remains the same, it’s our ability to CHOOSE that makes us feel truly free. Through the answers we’ve collected so far we’ve identified four elements of freedom.

  1. Flexibility – What you want, when you want and where you want. In short this is independence and choices free from restrictions.
  2. Self-actualization – This is about fulfilling your dreams, being free to pursue your passion while being free from judgement. This is strongly linked to doing work of your choice – a career or business you love.
  3. Responsibility – Creating stability for yourself and others by having control of your own security, health and financial situation ultimately makes you feel more free.
  4. Contribution – The ability to contribute, help others and to make an impact is a feeling of freedom on a whole other level.

Going For More Freedom

How do you go for achieving more freedom? Follow these baby steps:

Step 1 – Awareness of (your) definition of freedom (what do you want)

Not many people have truly thought about the definition of freedom and what it means to them personally, but when asked, most can tell you a few things that makes them feel free. These are usually literal things they attribute to the meaning of freedom.

So ask yourself the question “What makes me feel free?” Then write down your answers, discuss them with friends and start the conversation with people who matter in your life.

Step 2 – Understanding of (your) needs and purpose of freedom (why do you want it)

Not everyone thinks about why they define freedom a certain way, but everyone does have a deeper reason for why they desire freedom.

If you understand your needs and reason for wanting those “freeing” things in life, it is easier to achieve them.

Again, write down your why. Why do you want more freedom?

Step 3 – Action: map out personal plan (how can you get it)

Mapping out a plan needs to be done on an individual level based on your needs and wants, so who is better suited to do it but you?

It starts by getting very clear on your ideal lifestyle and what that looks like to you. Let the questions at the beginning guide you to finding your answers.

For more expert guidance, you can start by picking up a copy of my book The Suitcase Entrepreneur: Create Freedom in Business and Adventure In Life. In it I talk you through the three stages of Mindset, Business and Lifestyle that have personally led me to being a Freedomist, and thousands of others.

So, what does freedom mean to you?

Featured photo credit: Stocksnap via stocksnap.io

The post How to Break Free From Your Own Constraints And Live the Life You Want appeared first on Lifehack.

Daily Blogging Is the Best Worst Decision of My Professional Career

Posted from http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/JohnChowDotCom/~3/tMA-5W-GMtE/

I’ve been blogging on the Internet since before I even knew the word “blog,” let alone what it meant. When I first started out, it was nothing more than a humble text-based newsletter that I would manually distribute via e-mail (using the BCC field, of course). This was in the late 1990s. After that, I progressed to a hand-coded website that was hosted on Geocities. I would manually update the raw HTML of the homepage every time I had a new article, bumping the “recent posts” section accordingly. Even then, I had no idea what a “blog” was.

Of course, a lot has changed in the last couple of decades. I’ve been blogging professionaly for over ten years and I’ve become much more comfortable with content management systems like WordPress. When I first started out, the posting schedule was sporadic at best and I might go a month or more between posts. When I started doing this for a living, I made the decision at one point to blog daily on my own site.

And this was simultaneously the best and the worst decision I’ve ever made in my career as a freelance writer and professional blogger.

The Case for Daily Blogging

As difficult and as challenging as it may be, committing yourself to writing and publishing a new blog post each and every day offers numerous benefits, whether or not you choose to earn a full-time income from blogging itself.

First, blogging every day helps to hone your writing skills. It might sound like a brute force approach, but it is absolutely true that the more you practice, the better you’ll get at it. At the very least, you’ll get much more comfortable writing quickly and efficiently.

Second, blogging every day forces you to come up with fresh new ideas on a very frequent basis. It forces you to be creative, because no matter what niche you choose to approach, you’ll feel like you hit a brick wall eventually. The ideas will start to run dry and that’s when you can really challenge yourself to think outside the box and come up with truly original topics.

Third, blogging every day develops your discipline and creates a habit. When you’re working alone from home, it’s easy to slack off, procrastinate, and allow yourself to get distracted. There’s always tomorrow, right? But if you commit to daily blogging, you form a stronger structure for how you can run your online business and stick with it.

Why Blogging Every Day Is Bad

But there are two sides to every coin and daily blogging is no exception.

First, when you force yourself to blog every day, you can start to feel like you’re sucking all the fun out of it. What may have once been a fun and imaginative way to express yourself and to reach the wider world can start to feel like work. And the dot com lifestyle is not about work in the traditional sense. You can feel shackled and tied down, just like a 9-to-5.

Second, daily blogging can also lead to a lot of substandard content. If you only blog when inspiration strikes, it means that you’re more likely to publish content that is of higher quality. If you blog every day because you have to, you’ll end up writing some stuff on some days that just isn’t up to snuff… but you publish it anyway. And this can ultimately harm your online reputation.

Third, depending on the audience that you have on your blog, the length of your posts, and the kind of material that you publish, daily blogging can also lead to reader fatigue. Your subscribers can get too overwhelmed with how much you’re producing and you might start to stray away as a result. You could actually lose readers because you’re writing too much.

Fourth, the time commitment required to blog every day can detract from your opportunities to pursue and work on other projects. If you’re dedicating that much time and mindshare to writing a post, you’re not spending that time growing your social media presence, writing an e-book, or developing a membership site. You could be doing something else.

No Right Answer

Some people are going to tell you that blogging is going the way of the dodo. There are so many other platforms and blogging has become oversaturated. They’ll say it’ll eventually go the way of the traditional newspaper or magazine. I disagree. The format and style may change — it already has many times — but blogging is definitely here to stay. Whether or not you choose to do it daily is entirely up to you.

How To Make 6-Figure Monthly Online Income! Download John Chow’s New eBook!

7 Common Newsletter Problems Solved

Posted from http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ProbloggerHelpingBloggersEarnMoney/~3/i_WlVcoJFhQ/

7 common newsletter problems.png

Over the past few weeks, we’ve looked at why email newsletters are so important, what your email newsletter might look like, and how to choose the right service for you.

So is your newsletter up and running yet?

If the answer is “Yes”, is it working as well as you’d like?

If not, then read on.

I know a lot of bloggers find newsletters a bit daunting. And there are some really common problems that crop up again and again. Here are the seven I see most often:

Problem #1: You Know You Should Set Up a List, But You Haven’t Done It Yet

Hopefully, I’ve already convinced you that you need an email list. If you haven’t set yours up yet, it’s probably because you’re struggling to find the time or stuck in analysis paralysis.

Here’s what you can do:

  • Set aside some time this week. You don’t need a whole afternoon to set up your email list. You can do it in stages. If you can find just 15 minutes this week, that’s enough to get started. Take it step by step, and Google for instructions if you get stuck at any stage.
  • If you’re on a tight budget, use a free service. Mailchimp and MailerLite are both free up to 1,000 subscribers. If you find they’re not the perfect solution, you can move your list at a later stage. The important thing is to get started.

Problem #2: You’ve Set Up a List But You Haven’t Got Any Subscribers

So you’ve set up your list, but no-one’s subscribing. Before you do anything else, check that everything’s working. Open your website in a private/incognito browser window (or a different browser from your usual one) so you’re not logged in. Make sure your sign-up form appears, and that you can subscribe.

If everything works as expected, then:

  • Consider repositioning your email form. Most bloggers put it on the top right of their sidebar. If yours is somewhere different, people may be struggling to find it.
  • Try using a pop-up sign-up form.  Wordpress plugins such as Thrive Leads can do this, or you can use the forms offered by your email provider. Using one of these can dramatically increase your sign-up rate. And don’t worry about them getting in the way of your content and annoying your readers. You can set them to pop-up when a reader is about to leave your site.
  • Create an incentive for subscribers. Offer readers something special when they sign up. It could be a free download (such as an ebook, report, “cheat sheet” or printable), or an exclusive discount on your products.

 

Problem #3: You’ve Got Subscribers, But You Never Email Them

Maybe you’ve got everything set up well, with an attractive sign-up form that’s clearly visible and a compelling incentive. And you now have a handful of subscribers.

But you haven’t actually emailed them.

Perhaps you’re not sure what to write, or how often to email. Or maybe you think that with only 10 or 20 subscribers it’s not worth emailing anything at all.

It might help to:

  • Change your mindset. If 10 or 20 people want to hear from you, that’s a great start. Your early emails won’t be wasted. You can always reuse them, or link to them  in the future. (Most services archive your emails online.)
  • Create a content calendar for your email list. Rather than sending a link to your latest post or a weekly/monthly roundup of posts, use an editorial calendar to come up with some ideas ahead of time.

Problem #4: You Used to Email Your List, But Now it’s Gone Cold

In marketing, a ‘cold list’ is one that hasn’t received any emails in a while. Perhaps you sent out a weekly newsletter for six months, but then hit a busy spell and stopped emailing altogether. It happens to most bloggers at some stage, including me back in 2010.

This can be a scary situation.After such a long break, you may be worried your readers will unsubscribe, or even mark your emails as spam.

You can:

  • Reintroduce yourself to your readers. Acknowledge that it’s been a while since your last email (but don’t feel you need to apologise), and remind them who you are.
  • Run a survey to get to know your readers. This can be a great way to re-engage with old subscribers by focusing on what they want. (It’s exactly what I did when my list went cold in 2010.) And the results can be a fantastic source of ideas going forward.
  • Accept that some people will unsubscribe. Don’t be put off by readers unsubscribing. It just means they weren’t a good fit for your email list. If they’re not interested and never going to buy from you, it’s better they leave so they’re not costing you money.

Problem #5: Your Emails Aren’t Getting Opened, Delivered or Clicked On

Your email service will provide a report on how each mailout went – how many people opened your email, and how many clicked a link inside it.

And low numbers could mean something is wrong.

Note: It’s normal for your list to become less responsive as it grows. Some people may have changed email addresses, no longer be interested, and so on. (Here are some typical open and clickthrough rates.)

To turn things around:

  • Make there aren’t any technical problems. If you’re concerned your emails aren’t getting delivered, contact your email service’s technical support team and ask them to look into it.
  • Try out different subject lines for your emails. While some marketers use lines such as “Hey, what’s up?” and “Need your help” to entice people to open their emails, some readers find them downright annoying. With the ProBlogger weekly email, we use “ProBloggerPLUS” at the end of each subject line to make it clear what it is.
  • Change the sender name to make it clear who you are. For instance, with my emails I’m “Darren from ProBlogger”. Don’t use a generic name or partial email address (such as “info”) as the sender name.
  • Have clear calls to action in your emails. What do you want the reader to do after reading your email? Making your CTA clear, and providing a link where appropriate, should improve your clickthrough rate.

#6: You’re Becoming Too Self-Promotional

This can be a tricky problem to recognise. Unfortunately, it’s a mistake that some bloggers do make. I’m sure you can think of at least one email list you’ve unsubscribed from because you were getting pitched one product after another.

Take a look at your emails over the past month. Do you think the balance of promotion and content is reasonable? Would you keep subscribing to your list?

If you need to tweak things:

  • Come up with a short series of emails (perhaps three) designed purely to be helpful and useful to your readers. Send these out as your next emails.
  • Run a survey to find out what your readers would like to see in your newsletter, and do your best to deliver it.
  • Create a calendar for your promotions (including any affiliate promotions). Naturally you’ll want to promote your products over the longer term. But setting out different promotions on a calendar will help you avoid constantly pitching something.

#7: You’re Too Worried About Being “Pushy”

Some bloggers go too far the other way. Instead of being overly self-promotional, they don’t even mention they have anything for sale.

While you may get an occasional reader who hates  any sort of promotional content, most readers will be happy to hear about a product or service that could help them.

If you’re struggle to promote yourself:

  • Add a short message at the end of each email highlighting one of your products. You could mention a different product each week. You don’t need to use lots of “hype”. It’s often more effective to quote a customer testimonial than to praise the product yourself.
  • Run a sale for one of your products or services. Make it an exclusive sale just for your email list. People love to feel special, and get a bargain.

The worst mistake you can make with your email list is to do nothing at all. Every established blogger has a story about screwing something up with their list – not emailing for months, accidentally sending an email to the wrong list (it happened to us), or taking weeks to notice their sign-up sequence wasn’t working correctly.

Mistakes happen. But readers are usually very forgiving.

So get moving with your email list today. And leave a comment to let us know what you’ll be doing.

The post 7 Common Newsletter Problems Solved appeared first on ProBlogger.

      

Friends Don't Have to Grow Apart as You Grow Older

Posted from http://feeds.lifehack.org/~r/LifeHack/~3/8KEPMeRz9f8/friends-dont-have-to-grow-apart-as-you-grow-older

When you were young, the friends you made tend to be defined by common experience, for example living in the same neighborhood, going to the same school, having parents who are friends, riding the same bus, or participating in the same sports or extracurricular activities.

As you grow older, though, these elements change. You and your friends may move to different towns, have different works, come across different challenges in life, and may even lead a different lifestyle. Some may already get married and have their own children; some maybe traveling around all the times; some may always be busy making money.

This is when you realize your friendship with these friends has changed.

Research has shown that three main factors of developing adult friendships are proximity, repeated/unplanned interaction, and settings that encourage conversation.[1] If you’re constantly moving and working, though, these friendships can be harder to sustain.

A Shared Life Is Not Enough to Maintain A Lifelong Friendship

Too often, people focus on having a shared life with others. It’s actually less important for friends to physically be in the same life space. Friends need similar core values, which refers to subjective perspectives and beliefs on topics. You can align core values with someone who lives down the street or someone that lives 2,000 miles away.

Think about it like this: if you know someone who lives down the street (proximity), and you see them a lot at events (repeated/unplanned interactions), and it’s often in settings like bars and parties that encourage conversation, theoretically you should become friends with this person, right? Not necessarily.

If you and that person’s core values are completely misaligned, communication will be nearly impossible. Both of you may try to constantly prove the other person wrong and conflicts will be common.

Core values for humans are not easily changed, without an alignment there, it’s very hard for two people to become — and remain — friends.

Only the Values We Hold Can Build True Bondings

Humans are social animals. This is the core of the human experience. Humans came to dominate the world because we were the only species that could collaborate well, and form bonds, in large numbers.[2] We don’t seek just physical company; we seek mental company and an exchange of ideas and values.

Sharing your core values with another, and attempting to understand theirs is akin to sharing a piece of mind. This exchange of value and idea is crucial to satisfying basic human need. You can have a friend who you consistently have fun with, but if this core value exchange isn’t there, the friendship will erode when the environment changes. If you have a friend who’s fun and you’ve exchanged life values with, that friendship will remain despite the change of the environment.

Not every core value needs to overlap, it’s nearly impossible across any two people. For example, one friend can value punctuality and the other friend can constantly be late. This will make hanging out and communicating harder. But if the friend valuing punctuality is also flexible and adapts to different situations, now the timing is less relevant.

It doesn’t have to be a perfect alignment of core values between two people. But there needs to be some, and it needs to be shared.

Find out the Values of A Potential Friend

To find out whether you have shared values with another person, talk openly about your values. Of course, don’t say “What are your core values? My core values are.. blah blah blah…” This will sound awkward and the other person may feel uncomfortable about the question.

What you can do is asking “why” in conversations. “Why” leads to deeper answers and discussions then “how” — which primarily goes to process, and  “what” — which are only the basic facts. “Why” is the pathway to the thoughts and values of a potential new friend for life.

You don’t have to dig into the very deep philosophical questions at the beginning, start with something light like “what’s your hobby and why do you like doing it?” or “what’s your favorite place and why?” will be enough to get you to understand a person.

To help you have a better idea of what kind of things you can talk about, I’ve got you a list of questions to try with a potential friend:

  1. Why did you decide to move here?
  2. What’s your favorite podcast/book and why?
  3. Who’s your favorite author/artist and why?
  4. What’s your favorite movie/music and why?
  5. What do you do and why do you do what you do?
  6. Who’s your biggest inspiration, and why?
  7. What do you think about when you’re alone?
  8. Are you closer with your mom, dad, or neither? Why?
  9. What makes you happy and why?
  10. What upsets you and why?
  11. What do you like to do during weekend? Why?
  12. What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever seen, and why would you say it is?
  13. What motivates you the most, and why?
  14. Are you religious, and why?
  15. Who’s your best friend and why are you guys so close?
  16. What’s the main thing you’d like to change about yourself and why?
  17. Are you proud of some accomplishments so far? If so, why?
  18. Is there anything you’re afraid of and why?
  19. Do you like traveling and why?
  20. What’s your idea of a perfect vacation and why?
  21. Do you want to get a tattoo? Why?
  22. What are most important to you and why?
  23. If money were no object, what would you do all day and why?
  24. If you were to die tomorrow, what would you do?

Save this article and take this list out when you’re trying to make a new friend. Understanding the core values of another person is the first step to a strong and lasting friendship.

Featured photo credit: Bewakoof.com Official on Unsplash via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] The New York Times: Friends of a Certain Age
[2] Ted Idea: Why humans run the world

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How to Build an Unstoppable Mindset According to These 5 Popular Entrepreneurs

Posted from https://addicted2success.com/entrepreneur-profile/how-to-build-an-unstoppable-mindset-according-to-these-5-popular-entrepreneurs/

If you ask any of the top entrepreneurs, or any entrepreneur for that matter, they’ll tell you that the one quality you need to become successful is mental toughness. Becoming mentally tough is probably something you’ve already heard about before in your life. It’s something that seems easy, yet most people take it granted. They’d rather think about it than become it.

There’s a difference between thinking that you’re mentally tough and living mentally tough day in and day out.  Mental toughness will only get harder as you advance as an entrepreneur. There’s never an escape and either you’ll become a shield or it’ll knock you down and you won’t ever be able to recover.

When you think about the tough challenges in front of you today, they’ll seem super easy to overcome a year from now. But that only happens if you become mentally tough. You know you need to become mentally tough by now, yet it’s not enough to know without application of the process.

How exactly do you become mentally tough in your life? These 5 entrepreneurs and performance coaches share exactly what it takes to become mentally tough in your life:

1. Tony Robbins

According to Tony Robbins, becoming mentally stronger is like lifting weights. Over time, you will become stronger. No one starts off in the gym with an amazing physique because it happens over time.

However, becoming mentally stronger is more than just becoming stronger. It’s linking your pain and pleasure together. If you feel more pain than pleasure, you won’t perform an action. But if you derive pleasure from a certain action, then you’ll take action. The more action you take, the more mentally tough you’ll become.

Most people try to avoid pain. They’d rather live an average life than take risks which could bring them more pleasure. When you try to avoid pain, you’re not becoming mentally tough.

You need to stop and think about what’s stopping you from taking action? It’s almost always because you believe when you take that action you’ll receive more pain than pleasure. Your goal should be to take action even if there’s pain associated with that action, because that is how you become mentally stronger.

How do you think about procrastination? You’re giving up your mental freedom. You’re giving into pleasure because you only procrastinate when you want to avoid pain.

2. Grant Cardone

According to Grant Cardone, becoming mentally tough starts with having courage. Each and everyone one of us has the courage to live the best life possible but the majority of us don’t want to take advantage of it. Much like Robbins, we’d rather play it safe than absorb more pain in our life.

You already have courage. Because courage comes from the heart. It’s an innate instinct. If something was happening to your loved one, you’d get the courage real quick to rectify that situation. It’s there, you just have to harness the power on your own.

When you become mentally tough, you’re giving yourself the ability to risk it all. What happens if it doesn’t work out? Then you learn from it! It’s that simple, you don’t have to over-complicate it.

Do something today in spite of the fear you feel. Ask out that girl you’ve been thinking about or make the tough call you’ve been putting off. It’s these seemingly small actions you take each day that will allow you to become more mentally tough in your life.

As you continue to take more risks, you will be proud to be alive. You weren’t put here to live an average life. You were put here to take massive risks and live life to the fullest.

“Approach every situation with a whatever-it-takes-mindset.” – Grant Cardone

3. Eric Thomas

According to Eric Thomas, becoming mentally tough starts with not getting comfortable. Once you become comfortable in your life, you’re no longer going to go after your dreams. You’ll feel content with where you are and won’t want to push further. Your goal should be to improve each day, even if it’s only a small amount.

You must believe wholeheartedly in your dreams. Thomas said that he never talks to anyone before 1pm who aren’t 120% all in on their dreams. This allows you to get unnecessary negativity out of your life. There are millions of people who want to become successful but aren’t, why? Because they didn’t give everything to achieve their dreams.

To become more mentally tough in your life, it starts with changing your routine. If you can get up each morning at the same time, including weekends, you will become mentally tougher, it’s a given. I recommend checking out the book, Miracle Morning. This book is a great start to creating a morning routine for yourself.

The last thing Thomas said is where you put your focus, energy flows. If you think you can’t do something, then you’ll never be able to. But if you put your focus on achieving a desired outcome and will stop at nothing to achieve that outcome, then you’ll eventually achieve it.

4. Ben Newman

According to Ben Newman, becoming mentally tough starts with changing how you think. Ben has worked with numerous athletes and can attest on first hand that they can’t rely solely on their talents. Having talent can only take you so far.

To change the way you think starts with re-framing your mindset. If you’re up against a competitor whether in business or in sports, are you going to give up even if they’ve always been better than you? You shouldn’t because that’s what losers do.

Being from New England, it breaks my heart, but do you think the 2007 New York Giants thought that they couldn’t beat the Patriots even though they already lost previously in the season? They didn’t; they were mentally ready and didn’t count themselves out, no matter the opponent.

Start to focus on solutions instead of problems. People complain all the time but aren’t willing to find a solution. Why? Because it’s easier to complain than find a solution. If you want to become mentally tough, you can’t be like most people. You need to become a rare breed. You must be someone who no matter how much adversity they face will continue to take on the fight.

“The best way to reclaim your dignity is to act rationally and treat yourself lovingly. Do not self-destruct.” – Ben Newman

5. Patrick Bet-David

According to Patrick Bet-David, becoming mentally tough starts with taming the voices inside your head. All of us, it doesn’t matter who you are, each have good and bad voices inside of us. To become mentally tough, you need to block out the bad voice. When you can sense it arising inside of you, you need to push through. That’s the only way you will defeat that negative voice.

Bet-David would say that each of us needs a purpose. When you don’t have a purpose, there’s no chance of you becoming mentally tough. You’ll give into every day temptations and call it quits when you could’ve kept pushing. Developing mental toughness means you push yourself further than even what you thought was possible.

The last piece of advice Bet-David had was to think about how you’ll feel if you don’t go after your dreams? Will you be happy twenty years from now knowing you didn’t follow your dreams? It’ll be quite the contrary. You have the option and choices each day to determine how your life will be and mental toughness will help guide you.

Mental toughness is the essential quality in those who are successful and unsuccessful. Due to this, tell us how you develop this unstoppable mindset? Let us know in the comments below!

$200 Million in Gift Cards From Swagbucks!

Posted from http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/mrsjanuary/~3/soetgzKjuQ4/

Swagbucks is so close to its next HUGE milestone: $200 Million in gift cards and rewards given out to its members. T

hey are continuing the celebration with the 200 Million Swag Code Extravaganza! The 200 Million Swag Code Extravaganza begins on Wednesday September, 20th at 7AM PT/10AM ET.

6 Swag Codes worth a total of 50 SB The codes will be all over Swagbucks so be on the lookout! Please note: The above times are for CA only.

Sign up here to grab as many Swag Codes as you can and get your first gift card even faster!

The post $200 Million in Gift Cards From Swagbucks! appeared first on Coupons & Deals, Frugal Living.

$1,054,927.43 In 261 Days

Posted from http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/JohnChowDotCom/~3/9supWpORirs/

When I started 2017, one of my goals was to make $1 million in one year with MOBE. I am super excited to report that today (Sept 19, 2017) I have done it! At the time of this post, I was at $1015,137.66 payout plus $39,789.77 pending payout for a total $1,054,927.43 in just 261 days.

That works out to $4,041.88 per day or $168.41 an hour for every hour of the day. At this pace, I am looking at over $1.4 million for 2017 MOBE income.

MOBE has become my #1 online money-making system. It has allowed me to live Dot Com Lifestyle, drive $250K of cars for free, send Sally to one of the Top 50 private schools in America, and buy a $2 million house for cash.

Can I Really Do This Business?

One of the most common questions I get from people who are thinking about joining MOBE is, “Will all of this work for me?” and “Can I really do this business?” The answer is, regardless of your age, background, where you’re from, or your experience level, you can do this business. You can start your own online business, and be successful at it.

Your first first step is to download my ebook, the Ultimate Online Profit Model if you haven’t already done so. This details the business systems I use to make six-figure monthly income and live the Dot Com Lifestyle. You can also get my Blogging Secrets book at Amazon.

Attend The IM Freedom Workshop

If you wish to talk to an expert face to face about Internet marketing, then I invite you attend a live IM Freedom Workshop in your area.

Each workshop will have both an afternoon session and an evening session. Find the workshop that’s most convenient to you, and register now. Space is limited. Tickets are given out on a first come, first served basis. You must be pre-registered to attend. There is no on-site registration. Find the closest workshop here.

Apply for My Ultimate Dot Com Lifestyle Coaching Program

If you’re truly ready to move forward and make a positive change in your financial future, then go applying for my Ultimate Dot Com Lifestyle coaching program.

This is a 21 step system I created with MOBE to help you make your first $1,250, $3,300, $5,500, and even $10,000 online. You’ll also be given a one on one coach who will work with you, and answer any questions you may have. All you have to do is follow the system and do what your coach advises. You may not pull down $1 million in 261 days like I did, but it’s pretty easy to make $1,000 a month from it.

The application fee is one time $49, and allows you to go through all 21 steps. I recommend you go through the steps, then decide if this is something you want to do. If it is, great! Welcome aboard. If you decided this is not something you want to do at this time, then get a refund and go on with your life. I can’t make it simpler than that.

Click Here To Download John Chow’s New eBook, The Ultimate Online Profit Model!

10 Stylish And Durable Power Banks You Can Buy for Under $50

Posted from http://feeds.lifehack.org/~r/LifeHack/~3/bcRRfxrWzco/10-stylish-and-durable-power-banks-for-iphone-you-can-buy-for-under-50

People have been complaining about the battery life of their phones. With heavy use, a fully charged smartphone can still hardly last a day. I’m sure you’ve experienced the trouble of having to use your phone, and being unable to as you’ve ran out of battery. As such, many have found it useful to invest in additional power banks.

One issue with this is that many of the power banks on the market are too big to be easily carried around, are ineffective, are too expensive, or simply look bad. However, there are some power banks that are so well designed, and work so well with your phone that they completely change the way you use it.

Thanks to these power banks you’ll never need to worry about running out of power again.

1. The Nifty X – Wearable Cable with Powerbank

The NiftyX is unlike any other power bank on the market. Where many power banks are cumbersome and tricky to carry around, the NiftyX couldn’t be easier. This is a power bank you wear.

From the outside it looks like a cool decorative bracelet, in actuality it’s a high functioning and dynamic power bank ideal for the use when you’re out, usable whatever the weather. With it you can charge and sync your phone, wherever you are with ease.

It’s definitely one of the better looking and more versatile power banks.

Back this project NiftyX Bracelet Cable at Kickstarter, $33

2. Lifecard – The World’s Thinnest Powerbank

In 2016, Lifecard won iPhone Life magazine’s best of the prestigious Consumer Electronics Show (CES).The Lifecard is beautifully designed. It is just the size of a credit card, brilliantly compact, fitting in your wallet with ease, plus its stainless steel finish gives it a sleek, futuristic appearance and great durability. Though extremely thin, you don’t need to worry about it breaking.

What’s more, it can charge up to 80% of an iPhone 5s and 65% of an iPhone 6.

Lifecard – The World’s Thinnest Powerbank, $42.95

3. Pearl Compact Mirror Battery Pack

This is a product that is wholly unique. It merges the two worlds of fashion, and smartphone technology in such a way that is both unexpected and extremely inventive. The Pearl Compact Mirror Battery Pack is both a makeup mirror (two of them actually) and powerful USB recharging station. As such it is the perfect companion for a night out.

As a charging station, it is effective thanks to its 3000mAh lithium polymer battery. And as a make up station, it is fantastic with two mirrors (one ordinary , and one with 3x magnification) and a ring of LED lights around the mirror enabling you to apply makeup in low lighting.

Pearl Compact Mirror USB Rechargeable Battery Pack, $17.99

4. Power Bank Compact by FREEWISE

This power bank is slightly larger than others on this list, but its built in battery powers is as huge as 10,000 mAh. This multiple times the power of many other power banks. With this huge power output, you can charge more than one device at a time.

It’s perfect if you travel with multiple devices. You won’t need to worry about running out of power at all.

Power Bank Compact by FREEWISE, $19.99

5. Ankler Power Core Slim

The Ankler Power bank is sleek and slim in design, meaning it can be carried around anywhere with ease, and is largely unnoticeable until you need it.

Despite it’s slim design, it carries a significant amount of power, enough to fully charge an iPhone 6s twice, or a Samsung Galaxy S7 fully once. So it is ideal for getting a full charge easily wherever you are.

On top of this, it is protected by a silicon shield, keeping it well protected and scratch free.

Anker PowerCore Slim 5000 Portable Charger, $29.99

6. PocketFuel Power Bank Battery With Solar Panel

This power bank has built in sensors to detect if your device is fully charged, and if so, will shut off, meaning that it doesn’t waste any power by over charging your phone.

It gets its power from a highly sensitive solar power system which can charge from your house lights or overcast weather. It is perfect for the more adventurous users who want to keep their phones charged when hiking. It is fully waterproof, extremely tough, and has a built in flashlight. It also comes with a carabiner, so can be easily carried anywhere.

PocketFuel Power Bank Battery With Solar Panel, $39.90

7. Mophie Juice Pack Wireless and Charging Base (for iPhone 6/6S)

Where virtually all power banks need cables and wires to charge your phone, the Morphie Juice Pack charges your phone wireless. All you need to do is place your device on its charging base and your phone starts to charge automatically, so you don’t need to worry about carrying extra wires with you.

The pad is magnetic and it attaches to your phone smoothly and securely, keeping itself in place as it charges.It’s surprisingly small in size so can be taken with you easily.

It also senses if your phone is charged and reacts accordingly making sure your phone isn’t over charged, or overheats.

Mophie Juice Pack Wireless and Charging Base, $28.85

8. Monteverde Powerbank Ballpoint Pen

This is like something out of a James Bond movie. As you might expect by the name, the Power Bank pen is a power bank that also functions as a ballpoint pen.

Admittedly it doesn’t pack too much power, it houses a 650 mAh battery (which is good for an emergency charge). This isn’t so much of a problem because as it is a pen too, it is good to carry around with you anyway.

Most of the power banks on this list are easy to take with you, but this is a power bank that you’ll want to carry with you.

Monteverde Power Bank 2.0 Ballpoint Pen, $40.77

9. i.Valux Unique Designed Stand Shockproof Bumper iPhone 6 Plus/7 Plus External Power Bank Charger

This power bank is small in size so it can be easily taken with you. This power bank is also magnetized, and it comfortably attaches itself to your phone (though this uses wires). It is designed in such a way that you can use your phone, headphone jack, and camera easily, even while it is charging.

It is built out of high quality plastic, so it keeps your phone protected. Even if you drop it, it won’t sustain damage.

On top of everything else, it protects your phone from over charging, overheating, short circuiting, or discharging.

i.Valux Unique Designed Stand Shockproof Bumper iPhone 6 Plus/7 Plus External Power Bank Charger, $19.49

10. Powrtabs Disposable Power Pack

This power bank is by far the most environmentally friendly. It is 100% recyclable (even the battery) and each one has been made from recycled plastic. They are great for providing a quick blast of emergency power as they charge quickly.

They are designed strictly for emergencies and are single use only. This isn’t as big a problem as it sounds though, as they are far cheaper than any other power bank on this list, and as mentioned, you’ll find no problems getting rid of it.

Powrtabs Disposable Power Pack, $9.99

The post 10 Stylish And Durable Power Banks You Can Buy for Under $50 appeared first on Lifehack.

32 Inspirational Mother Teresa Quotes

Posted from https://addicted2success.com/quotes/32-inspirational-mother-teresa-quotes/

Mother Teresa, known in the Catholic Church as Saint Teresa of Calcutta, is one of the most recognized humanitarian figures in recent memory.  From an early age, Mother Teresa dedicated her life to charity and helping those in need all around the world.  Even though much of her drive comes from her loyalty to her faith, her story and wisdom continues to inspire millions to this day even after her death in 1997.

Here are some of her most inspirational quotes:

1. “Peace begins with a smile.” – Mother Teresa

2. “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” – Mother Teresa

3. “Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.” – Mother Teresa

4. “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” – Mother Teresa

5. “There are no great things, only small things with great love. Happy are those.” – Mother Teresa

6. “We fear the future because we are wasting the today” – Mother Teresa

7. “I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love.” – Mother Teresa

8. “Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do… but how much love we put in that action.” – Mother Teresa

9. “If you can’t feed a hundred people, then feed just one.” – Mother Teresa

10. “It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.” – Mother Teresa

11. “Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.” – Mother Teresa

12. “When you don’t have anything, then you have everything” – Mother Teresa

13. “I know God won’t give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”

14. “Live simply so others may simply live.” – Mother Teresa

15. “I want you to be concerned about your next door neighbor. Do you know your next door neighbor?” – Mother Teresa

16. “Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.” – Mother Teresa

17. “We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.” – Mother Teresa

18. “Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.” – Mother Teresa

19. “Joy is prayer; joy is strength: joy is love; joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls. ” – Mother Teresa

20. “True love is a giving, and giving until it hurts” – Mother Teresa

21. “One of the greatest diseases is to be nobody to anybody.” – Mother Teresa

22. “The miracle is not that we do this work, but that we are happy to do it.” – Mother Teresa

23. “Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.” – Mother Teresa

24. “Let us always meet each other with a smile, for a smile is the beginning of love” – Mother Teresa

25. “Our life of poverty is as necessary as the work itself. Only in heaven will we see how much we owe to the poor for helping us to love God better because of them.” – Mother Teresa

26. “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” – Mother Teresa

27. “Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person” – Mother Teresa

28. “Intense love does not measure, it just gives.” – Mother Teresa

29. “Let us touch the dying, the poor, the lonely and the unwanted according to the graces we have received and let us not be ashamed or slow to do the humble work.” – Mother Teresa

30. “God doesn’t require us to succeed, he only requires that you try.” – Mother Teresa

31. “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.” – Mother Teresa

32. “Even the rich are hungry for love, for being cared for, for being wanted, for having someone to call their own.” – Mother Teresa

Which quote resonated with you the most?  Comment below!